For The Times You Think Drunk Texting Your Ex Is A Good Idea
24
MARCH, 2016

Mental Floss

It is, usually, when a wave of loneliness washes over us on a Saturday night that we feel, everything that we are can be contained in a hug from someone who cares. There’s a myriad of thoughts, comparing our love lives so far with those of others and anxiety grips our insides as we start entertaining the possibility that maybe, just maybe, the fault is in us. Talking to friends only goes so far as to be momentary comfort and as soon as they hang up, it is the same blue numbness all over again.
It is at this moment that we realize that we are desperate to feel loved. Here are the things that imminently do ensue.
Made by Harshi Lal
  • The Playlist

It is our tendency to feed our emotions with stimuli that accentuate the same. We quickly find the saddest possible music and lay in bed conveniently making ourselves feel worse. Because self care is for the weak, obviously. This playlist can be a one night thing or can persist for days.

Give yourself a break. While we may say that our emotions aren’t completely under our control, our choice of music definitely is.

  • Texting The Ex

There is reason behind every failed relationship. And while in those moments of weakness, it is easy to overlook all differences and grip on to any sort of comfort an ex might provide, please remember the reason why it ended. It had not worked out before this; it will not work out now. Any amount of adjustment or compromise that you might momentarily be willing to make, will not change how the two of you are as people.

Understand your vulnerability and do yourself a favor. Don’t text that ex.

  • Self Bashing

This is something I read online and has stuck with me, “Consider yourself a 10 year old; and protect this person at all costs.” Our relationship with ourselves is important. We cannot be telling ourselves that we’re insufficient. We cannot muse about our failures and mistakes and let them define our present selves. We are all capable of love, but we love differently. It is about the person embracing your way. Moreover, understand we are perfectly capable to give ourselves the care and adoration we usually keep aside for our significant others. Love is not a scarce resource. There’s enough for us all. Let there be enough for you.

  • Acknowledging The Desperation™

After a point, it becomes apparent that we are over thinking. We also realize and start to accept the desperation. Talk to a friend when this happens. Our thoughts can become a mesh of barbed wires if left closeted. This friend can be the reality check we need. Try not holding things back. When you’ve split it all, a sense of comfort envelops the anxiety underneath. We’re all human. We understand desperation. We’ve all been there.

The worst thing we can do at this point of time is get into a relationship for the heck of it. The most awful bit is that we’re aware that it will not work out. We only do it to avoid our own insecurities of never finding love. It is an unfair move. Unfair to ourselves as well as the person we date. They deserve better than just someone trying to feel accepted which has nothing in particular to do with them. You’ll only worsen the situation multi-fold this way.

Give yourself some time. Take it easy. Consider yourself a complete unit, perfectly functional, without the “other half”.

Love will come.

Namrata Chatterjee

Namrata Chatterjee

Mental Floss

 

The first conversation you have with Namrata Chatterjee, you would probably expect her to become the President. The second conversation you have with her, well, not so much.
An ardent acolyte of psychology, she is an academic scholar and an even better writer. From debating to designing she has tried her hand at everything D. What would intrigue you the most about this remarkable young lady, is that even after all the “edgy” situations she has landed herself in, she never relies on aggression for any solution, unlike some of the other people leading us. Rather, she prefers logic infused with loads of kindness to do the same. An absolute sweet slump, she is in desperate need for compliments.

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